Olympic Ceremonies.

The opening ceremony in China was indeed spectacular. Thousands of toned youths performing in perfect unison. Colour, style and lavish entertainment. A pyrotechnic extravaganza and a  huge stadium of unique design.

But the world has seen nothing yet. Just wait for the opening ceremony for the Olympics in Britain.

The world will be staggered to watch a myriad of obese young people wobbling around in an unfinished stadium and waving, with no discernable coordination, flags and sparklers.

It will not be a hard act to follow.